Jewish Dialogue Group

About Us > Praise for our Work

Staff, Board and Advisory Committee Press Praise for Our Work

College and University Dialogue Programs

"I feel comfortable talking about a lot of things, but I always felt uneasy discussing my views on Israel with fellow Jews before the Jewish Dialogue Group facilitated a conversation at our Hillel. JDG's well-designed materials and talented leaders helped me to not only express my own thoughts on the conflict, but also to reach a better understanding of other positions. I can't overstate the value of this program—lots of people know how to speak to others, but JDG can help you talk with them."

—Dan Ross, Education Chair, University of Pennsylvania Hillel

"I am a rabbinical student in my final year, have lived 2 years in Israel, and listen to the news. I have concluded that being able to LISTEN and speak with Jews, much less Muslims in our tense, unhappy world today is the most important work we can be doing. I was fortunate to be able to participate in a session with the Jewish Dialogue Group. Speaking as a former social worker who has participated in a great amount of group work, I can say that they were totally professional, and arranged to the last detail to make us feel as comfortable and safe as possible in order that we might listen, and speak our minds. Seeing others in the image of God is tough work, and it is incumbent upon us to work hard at it. The way we deal with each other over difficult issues is the beginning of the problem or solution to world problems. I highly recommend participating in a dialogue group."

—Me'irah Iliinsky, student, Reconstructionist Rabbinical College

"The atmosphere created by JDG was unlike any I've felt before. I am usually wary of discussions because true dialogue is rare and while debate is common. JDG's style was a breath of fresh air compared to my experiences. I also realized how accessible it is to transfer the same approach to daily life."

—Tal Raviv, student, University of Pennsylvania

—Jake Goodman, M.Ed, 2007 graduate of the Jewish Theological Seminary

Participants in the Jewish Dialogue Group Fellowship Program

(In the fall semester of 2006, students at five colleges and universities in Philadelphia and New York came together in small groups to talk with each across political differences about the Israeli-Palestinian conflict. Each of the five groups met 7 times over the course of the semester.)

"Before, I would not say anything about my opinion on Israel/Palestine until I knew that a person had views that were similar to mine. Since participating in the Jewish Dialogue Fellowship, I no longer fear having discussions with people who have different opinions than mine. Now I am working to bring students at my campus together who have different opinions to learn from each other and to find common ground."

—Katherine Cohen, student, Temple University

"Nowhere on campus have I ever witnessed a group with more mutual respect for one another than the Jewish Dialogue group. It was the first time I could speak comfortably without having to hide or compromise my opinions. I always knew that my fellow members listened to what I said with interest and understanding rather than with judgment. Miraculously, I too was able to listen to dissenting viewpoints without automatically conjuring up a defensive response. We were all in pursuit of a mutual understanding; not in pursuit of imposing our views, and I do wholeheartedly believe that we, as a group, reached our goal."

—Paul Bloch, student, Haverford College

"If I could walk in someone's shoes in order to better understand where they are coming from, I would choose my oldest brother. While it would seem that I would know exactly where my own sibling is coming from, since we were raised in the same home, I am flabbergasted at how different we are and the difficulties we have in understanding each other. Our biggest barrier in relating to each other is how we feel about Israel.

—Danielle, student, Columbia University & Jewish Theological Seminary

"While I can't think of a time that I have been afraid to discuss my views on the Israeli–Palestinian issue, I can't think of a time that such a discussion did not turn into an argument. This program helped me accomplish the very important, and underrated, skill of listening. I was able to move beyond seeing the person I was speaking to as an opponent, one whom I was simply trying to convert to my way of thinking. I looked forward to the sessions even when it meant going back to campus after an already long day at school and work (being a courier at the time, a long day typically meant riding 40 miles on my bike).  The Jewish Dialogue Group provided an atmosphere in which its participants felt free to voice a wide range of opinions about a highly charged topic while at the same time fostering a sense of understanding."

—Tom Ballingall, student, Temple University

"The Jewish Dialogue Group was an excellent opportunity. It allowed me to voice my own opinions in an open and safe environment, while also learning about the viewpoints of others. As I heard what other people had to say, and realized that we shared many similar views, I became more comfortable with my own opinions. The group also provided me with skills and techniques to help me carry out difficult and controversial conversations. Another positive aspect of the experience was the cohesiveness that our group shared, helping everyone to feel safe as we discussed very difficult topics."

—Melissa Pottash, student, Bryn Mawr College

Synagogue Dialogue Sessions

"I enjoyed our dialogue group about the Israeli-Palestinian conflict very much and I feel I got a lot out of it. It didn't change my thinking but it gave me a place to do that thinking out loud -- to be heard and valued for my thoughts and to likewise look at the thoughts of others in an atmosphere of caring and respect. That was the most important thing for me. People's feelings on this subject are so heated that over time I think most of us have just learned to keep our thoughts to ourselves and feel rather lonely in our stance to what's happening in Israel -- whatever “side” we're on. What was clear in getting to listen to people I already felt connected to within the respectful framework Devra created was that the thinking of each one of us comes from our heart -- from a place of deep caring for ethics, for Israel, and for the Jewish people. That changed the whole 'disagreement' landscape that it has looked to me like we’re in. It no longer looked like there were two 'sides.' It looked like it was a hard issue around which each of us was struggling for insight and comprehension and useful thoughts about the way forward."

From a 5-part dialogue series at Society Hill Synagogue (Philadelphia):

"The Jewish Dialogue Group gave us the tools to listen with respect to each other on this painful and emotional issue. With the guidance of the leaders, we experienced several breakthroughs, seeing that there were more pieces of this problem that we had in common than issues that divided us. We hope to use this model in other circumstances within the congregation where we can put these valuable tools to work again."

—Fran Gallun, former president of Society Hill Synagogue

"The process was surprisingly effective. We learned listening skills that enabled us to truly hear what others had to say, even if we disagreed with them, on an issue about which we all care deeply. And we came to recognize thet there were many areas of agreement. This led to mutual respect, some changes in positions held, and a desire to share what we had experienced with other members of the SHS community."

—Phyllis Denbo

"Many of us have formed strong opinions about the Israeli/Palestinian conflict. When the sessions began Michael and I had recently returned from Israel. Being part of the Jewish Dialogue Group gave me the opportunity to listen to others who did not share my particular views on the problem. Even more, it afforded me the chance to see that many of us care deeply about Israel's future. I appreciated the chance to share with my fellow congregants and get to know them better."

—Carole LeFaivre-Rochester

"These monthly sessions began as a venue for people to express and listen to differing views about the Middle East, but they've evolved into something much more: a therapeutic way of working out any kind of disagreement in a mutually respectful manner-at home, business, anywhere!"

—Dan Rottenberg

"One of our first charges was to understand which issue had the greatest source of controversy between us. It ended up being the barrier/wall/fence. Five months later this issue which had separated us, in essence, brought us together. Over this period of time we have built up a trust in each other, an ability to listen to opposite views, and an emotional tie which was greater than the controversy which had originally separated us."

—Fred Edelstein

Other

"My participation in the Jewish Dialogue Group over the past few years has made a big difference in my life. ... I am no longer as frustrated by people who have a different position from me. When I engage in dialogue with people who do not hold my position, I try to understand more deeply what they think and why." (more)

—Ora Kesselman
Jewish Program Coordinator for Federation Early Learning Services,
Jewish Federation of Greater Philadelphia

"It is often so difficult to talk with anyone about Israel for fear that the conversation may  take a direction that will be painful, infuriating, depressing. And it's pointless - not to mention also painful, infuriating or depressing - to listen to ones fellow Jews scream at each other out of intense frustration when they encounter opposing views. So in spite of a deep attachment to Israel and strong feelings about how peace may be achieved, I'm someone who tends to avoid such conversations unless I'm reasonably certain that the person with whom I'm speaking more or less agrees with me (and really, what does that accomplish other than a useless feeling of self-satisfaction?). It didn't seem possible that the Jewish Dialogue group could actually promote Jewish dialogue in which I could participate.

"But that's what happened a few weeks ago in a small group setting at the JCC in Manhattan. Because of the extremely well thought out and well articulated methodology created by this group I was able to listen to others with whom I did not agree without wanting to jump in and "get my points across". Rather, I listened closely and carefully, confident that I would have the same opportunity to express myself. And through that listening I came to a better understanding of my deep feelings and was able to express them calmly and clearly when it was my turn to speak. This is a wonderful model to help Jews speak with each other across the many divides in our community."

—Rabbi Carol Levithan

Rabbinic Director & Senior Director of Adult Programs

Jewish Community Center in Manhattan

"Never have I had the opportunity to be so honest with myself about how the Israeli-Palestinian conflict touches me on a daily basis as when I participated in a dialogue session with JDG. For the first time, I was able to give voice to the web of emotions and intellectual commitments that both entangle me and motivate me as I jump between my educator roles in synagogue and university life. To discover that other Jewish professionals were willing to listen—and even find themselves with similar questions—this was incredibly eye-opening and exciting."

—Andrea Siegel
PhD candidate, Columbia University MEALAC Department
Israel Educator, Congregation B'nai Jeshurun, NYC

"Last spring I was invited to attend the Jewish Dialogue Group in Philadelphia ... That night I expressed my feelings in a safe, non-judgmental atmosphere. It felt liberating and revealing. In expressing myself I became more aware of my own feelings."

—Rabbi Renée Bauer, Congregation Mayim Rabim (Minneapolis)

Kol Nidre Sermon 5766 (read full sermon)

"I recently attended a Jewish Dialogue group. It was the first time I ever spoke about my feelings and issues regarding Israel. Since then I have been inspired to read more about current events in Israel and discuss the situation with a few friends. I would definitely attend another group as I feel just the one session made a difference for me."

—Jill Stone, North Brunswick, NJ

"After attending two sessions of the Jewish Dialogue Group, I began to uncover the importance of understanding and articulating how the political situation in Israel makes me feel personally. All too often, I think our instinct is to try to bolster our position with more and more facts, thinking that the facts will win someone over to our perspective, the "right perspective." When in reality, just as significant (if not more) than articulating factual information is expressing how you feel accurately. The Dialogue format is also a powerful tool that is applicable to many avenues of life — learning to dialogue productively without argument and with mutual respect is invaluable."

—Evelyn Tauben (Philadelphia)

The dialogue group that I participated in was so full of respect and good listening that  I was able to feel deeply and speak from my heart without censoring myself. The two facilitators held the energy of the group creating safety and spaciousness. It was a healing experience.

—Rabbi Vivie Mayer, Member of the Reconstuctionist Rabbinical Association

I went from seven months of intense organizing in the West Bank to a three month eco-Jewish fellowship. Bringing up the Israeli-Palestinian conflict made everyone uncomfortable and I was uncomfortable being in a Jewish space where it wasn't discussed. It was such a blessing to have the Jewish Dialogue Group come and facilitate a discussion. Just sitting and dialoguing one time allowed us to open in a way we never could. We had the opportunity and space to be real with each other about our backgrounds, our experiences, and our hopes for creating a healthy Jewish space and community. People suddenly had the invitation to leave defenses behind, and go past intellectual and rehashed arguments. We finally dug deeper -- to the core of where we hold feelings about the conflict that fuel our actions or our apathy. After the dialogue, people were more eager to discuss the situation and our role within it. We could enter these conversations as more respectful listeners."

I really enjoyed participating with a group of Jews in an exercise in which we were able to gently, warmly, and openly share our agreements and disagreements with each other about the Palestinian-Israeli Conflict.  Not that anyone's mind was particularly changed at the end, but the dialogue allows for all of us to remember that we are all humans figuring out ways to care for Israel.

 —Rebecca Budner, Portland, OR

For me, participating in what has become an ongoing, albeit infrequently meeting Activist Dialogue Group has been transformative - and a source of amazement, support, and surprise. Each meeting provides very palatable bite- size experiences that reconfigure my internal world. Each encounter is an opportunity to stretch my interpersonal, spiritual, and emotional muscles. 

Here’s my ultimate admission: As a result of my experience with the Jewish Dialogue Group, the world is more interesting, less black and white. My conversations on Israel-Palestine are more satisfying. I am more tolerant of difference. My activism is more thoughtful and less reactive. I see and hear more clearly. Actually, I like myself better – and as a result, I like everyone else a bit more, too. (read more)

—Susan Landau, Philadelphia

"My participation in the JDG process has been a wonderful opportunity to share candidly, in a safe, confidential environment and from the heart, which while rare these days, is paramount now more than ever, for maintaining a cohesive community. This unique forum provides just the right blend of compassion and critique for those grappling with these challenging and oftentimes divisive issues. The most significant outcome for me has become gaining key insights from this group regarding both the perspectives and the reactions of all the dedicated participants including myself, as together we search for greater communal understanding and multiple points of connection."

Lighter,
Closer
Clearer
Having no idea how far we might roam
But before long
On this meandering path before us,
As pleasantries give way to idle,
Then deeper conversation
Our eyes embrace
And we turn the bend,
When our voices quickly lower

Now the real journey has begun
Behind, we leave judgement and shame
Ahead, our pain becomes intertwined
In terrain less familiar
Our footing falters, our faith flexes
At times we appear to know exactly where we are
And at others our destination seems a mystery

Yet we eagerly persist
And the burdens heavy at first
Feel a little less cumbersome as we
Thoughtfully
Navigate our way
Unsure exactly why, but grateful for
A space so safe

Carefully, we carry on
With a growing determination to emerge
A little closer to ourselves
A little further from our hurt
Trusting we'll loose some of our load
Retrieve some of our hope
And find one another
A little bit lighter,
clearer,
closer
than before

—Rafi Levin, Philadelphia